holytoastr | Thank you.

This evening has reminded me how very much the people around me care about me. And honestly, I don't think I deserve it. But I appreciate it.

This evening many many friends IMed me. They reminded me that they liked me around and that they were there for me no matter what. I was invited by several people to go visit them and watch movies and eat food, but I wasn't feeling up to it. I kinda wanted to spend the evening in my little hole of a room where I was warm and safe. And everyone understood and didn't push me out to see them.

This evening I got more phone calls than I've ever gotten in an entire week. People checking in on me and people invited me to do things this weekend. And even though I couldn't talk to them for very long (I had company over), I was glad that they called.

This evening ben came over. We made tea with kool-aid, strawberry syrup, and milk in it. It was a strange taste, but not all thta bad. And because he was here, I was able to not cry. Right now staying strong is very important to me right now. And every little bit of support has helped more than anyone can imagine.

This evening has made me realize how loved I am. And I don't need the one that has been hurting me. For some reason I felt that I did. As if I'd be all alone again if I lost that friendship. But now I see that I have so many amazing, caring, loving friends. I think I am able now to go on. At least, I'll try to. And if I start falling apart again, I'll remember tonight and how every single person I know made some effort to care for me.

I only hope I can be as good a friend to all of you as you have been to me. I will try my hardest. And while I will still be sad for some time, I won't let it be the dominant emotion. For everyone else's sake, I am going to try to be happy again. I want to eventually reach a point where I can say that I have earned all of this kindness.