(no subject)
Oct. 5th, 2005 09:17 amLast night I broke down crying again. Same thing as always...lonely.
And as always when I start crying over that, I start blaming ben for ignoring me, which is an awful thing to say because he gives me plenty of attention. But I'm so sad at the time I can't think straight. I'm glad ben still loves me and forgives me even though I go crazy sometimes.
So I'm going to step up my efforts to meet people to hang out with. I was thinking of volunteering at the local anime con, for example. I bet I'd be less bored at the con anyway, if I'm busy the whole time. So I'm going to volunteer until my badge is free, and while I'm at it I'll try to make friends with people.
Maybe I'll look into classes and stuff nearby too. Or maybe volunteer for an event.
I just want to have people I can hang out with, so I don't go all crazy when ben wants a few hours to himself. It's not fair to him that he needs to pay attention to me every waking hour so I won't go crazy.
I should at least go fabric shopping tonight so I can sew while he's off doing his thing. I didn't go yesterday because I was so miserably lonely.
And as always when I start crying over that, I start blaming ben for ignoring me, which is an awful thing to say because he gives me plenty of attention. But I'm so sad at the time I can't think straight. I'm glad ben still loves me and forgives me even though I go crazy sometimes.
So I'm going to step up my efforts to meet people to hang out with. I was thinking of volunteering at the local anime con, for example. I bet I'd be less bored at the con anyway, if I'm busy the whole time. So I'm going to volunteer until my badge is free, and while I'm at it I'll try to make friends with people.
Maybe I'll look into classes and stuff nearby too. Or maybe volunteer for an event.
I just want to have people I can hang out with, so I don't go all crazy when ben wants a few hours to himself. It's not fair to him that he needs to pay attention to me every waking hour so I won't go crazy.
I should at least go fabric shopping tonight so I can sew while he's off doing his thing. I didn't go yesterday because I was so miserably lonely.
no subject
Date: 2005-10-05 06:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-10-05 07:00 pm (UTC)And I think being a crazy dog lady would be the last thing I want to do if I want people to like me. :(
no subject
Date: 2005-10-05 07:04 pm (UTC)